Iowa -- land of great skies

If you haven't taken the time today to look up at the sky, do it now.
Just returned from walking my Springer Spaniel. Iowa has some of the prettiest skies. Today, the clouds are in a turmoil with storms from the southwest. The sun is shining through the anxious scene, low in the sky.

This weekend we change the clocks back making the sun even lower at this time of day. These views remind me of my place in life, take care of my family on the ground, occasionally get to fly in the clouds, do my part to reduce pollution in the air and on the ground, and observe the earth in its many moods. Fabulous sky.

Family & Medical Leave Act not so great for new dads

In 1993, the U.S. Congress passed the Family and Medical Leave Act. It allows workers to take time off work to care for family members or themselves. They get their job back when they return. Sometimes pay is received during the time off, sometimes not. It is wonderful for an adult child who has to tend to an ill elderly parent. Great for a spouse to care for a sick spouse. New baby? Great for mom but not so great for dad.

Sure, the first week is helpful for the new mom and to bond with the baby. After that, it becomes a drain and all the dad can think about is when he can escape to his job. Jobs are mostly reliable as to what is expected of you for the day. You don't have to listen to crying babies all day and all night. Your time is your own, not controlled by a little tiny being that needs to be held, soothed, fed, burped and cleaned up.

With a new baby in the house, you can always recognize the worker who is a new dad or mom by that exhausted look on their faces as they muddle about doing their job. Most employers accept this. After about 3 months the baby should be sleeping through the night and mom and dad will return to their normal selves.

Consider this if you are going to be a new dad: How much time do you really want to take off work? Can you handle chaos from an 8 pound version of you? Will the noise drive you up the wall seeking normalcy? I'm not being chauvinistic when I say moms are more nurturing and can usually handle it better, realizing there is a wonderful rainbow at the end of the first few weeks.

What a great dad!

Did you see the video of a recent Philly's baseball game? A foul ball was knocked into the stands. A man caught it then gave it to his very young daughter who promptly threw it towards the baseball game.

Some dads would have been angry and shouted at the child. This dad laughed and hugged his daughter. That was the best response.

Congratulations, Dad, for following Number 2 on Single Parent Wisdom scale of advice: Be Patient and Loving. Way to go. I'm proud of you and your daughter is fortunate to have a loving dad like you.

Parents Mad at President Obama

Obama raised fear in the hearts of parents across the United States by announcing a talk to students. After a campaign, not so long ago, that had the major television networks praising every step he took, I can understand their fear. What is his agenda? Is he going to turn our children into Democrats? Liberals? No, school teachers are more likely to do that. College professors will definitely try.

So, today is the big day of the talk. I just read the speech at http://news-public.com/. I did not see any propaganda that I don't already promote in my book, 25 Ways to Encourage Good Behavior from the Single Parent Wisdom series. Obama simply encourages children to take responsibility for their actions and realize they control their fate, no matter the situation. Now we need their parents to do the same.

Not a very Democratic speech. Most of the time, this President tells us to rely on the government to fix all our problems. Personally, I prefer to rely on myself and hope for less government interference. Perhaps after he says the speech out loud to the students and cameras, he will realize he could promote less government, not more. We can only hope.

For my book series, Single Parent Wisdom, I asked over 50 single parents with children now grown to reflect on what worked and what didn't while raising their children. Compiling their answers and adding mine, I found 7 areas of advice recurring from their answers:

1. Be Consistent.
2. Be Patient & Loving.
3. Time is Short.
4. Be Age-Appropriate.
5. Reduce the Chaos.
6. Be a Role Model.
7. Live in the Present.
   

I list these at the beginning of each of the 16 books, starting with "25 Ways to Encourage Good Behavior."

Introducing Single Parent Wisdom

Wow. Setting up this blog is easier than it looks. I can't say that for parenting, though -- especially single parenting. This blog will be used to discuss the many facets of parenting and a few more about the world of single parenting. I ask that you bare with me as some day's I will probably write a lot and some days, nothing at all.

Hopefully, there will be much give and take between others. I like sharing of ideas and viewpoints. To begin: I was a single parent for 11 years of my 3 children. After they became adults, I started writing about the experience seeking answers to the questions and problems I faced as a young single parent. Now that I'm older, I believe young people need to listen to those who have gone before them with similar experience. We have much to teach each other and can make parenting easier. You do not have to go it alone.